The idea of going to Goa in 93 days at the moment feel more like an idea than a reality. That doesn't mean I’m not excited to go, don’t get me wrong every time I think about it I get butterflies in my tummy and a load of incredible memories come flooding back but there are a couple of hurdles to jump through before I feel like the idea can become a reality. These are mainly my exams that are taking up most of my time and energy but also Lark in the Park and all the preparation that has to come before we leave to go to Goa; like the preparation to be able to lead worship out there. Finishing my exams and doing all the other stuff that comes before going on mission is incredible though because it builds up the excitement and anticipation for what is to come. Iit creates time to press into what God has instore for us to do in Goa and to seek direction for what is to come as well as the way it will unravel.
At the moment I have just over £100 to raise which I am very happy with. When I signed up to go to Goa I had no idea how to raise the money and it almost put me off applying but then I realised that I had nothing to fear because if it was Gods plan for me to go then he would find a way and he has and I have learned a couple of things along the way (most of which I’m still learning). My favorite Bible verse is Philippians 4:13 and it says 'I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength' and this is what I'm learning, to find strength from a place outside of myself and to rest in that place before I even clean my teeth in the morning.
Although there is great excitement about going and every time I think of it my heart starts racing, there is something in me that is slightly apprehensive about going. Partly I think it's the food, I don’t really like curry and when I went to Goa the first time I found that I wasn't really eating much. Last time I went this wasn't so much of an issue but I still found it difficult to eat curry every day. Although, not liking curry does make me appreciate things like chips and gravy!
This year I've been really challenged by how much stuff I take with me. Last time I went I had far to many clothes and ended up not even wearing some of them. This year I don't want that mentality of having my clothes as almost a type of comfort blanket, to be challenged and I want to act on it. My goal this year is to try and only take a hand luggage bag worth of clothes and other stuff for me and to live off the very basics, to embrace the idea of not having a whole wardrobe of clothes to choose from. This will then allow me to use the extra space to bless Bethesda Life Centre and the people that I encounter along the journey in India.
I went to Goa on mission in 2011 and 2012 and I went with the mentality that it was for my benefit; that I would come back changed and I got caught up in how it would impact me. I almost lost sight of the real reason we were there but now I'm realising that this isn't really the case. There is plenty of time for me to receive but for two and a half weeks I am laying my life down and fixing my eyes on something bigger, I'm there to serve the King of Kings in a way that is going to make an impact far bigger than I could ever imagine. As long as my eyes are fixed on Jesus and my heart is surrendered to Him and in a place ready to serve then what I get out of it is an added bonus.
If you are a person who loves to bless people by interceding for them, then please do pray for me, that I would be live out of a place of strength in God rather than my own strength but that also I would be walking in the gift that he has given me even before I go so that I would be best equipped and living most effectively for him.
